unicorny toad

June 17, 2008

As the lovely, breezy Southern California Spring comes to and end and a crippling, eyeball melting Summer imposes itself upon a surprisingly, unsuspecting populace, the one saving grace just might be the unicorny toad.

Why, you ask?

Well, in addition to being cute as the dickens, unicorny toads provide a rather unique service. When the sun is at it’s highest, you will find scores of these little dudes hopping along Ventura Blvd., like mini Lords of the Dance, kicking up their little webbed feet and reaching unusual heights for such small creatures. This consequently works up quite a sweat for the unicornies, causing them to become all the more frantic, hopping and twirling, now, like crazed, whirling dervishes. During the frenzied high-hopping, their uni-horns become lodged in the eaves of surrounding office buildings. As they hang in the eaves, catching their collective breaths, sweat, which from unicornies, is quite sweet and cool, rains down on passersby, supplying them with an unexpected, refreshing spritz.

After this brief but welcome spritzing, the unicorny toads, having recovered a normal heartbeat, gently float back down to the sidewalk, where the whole process starts over again and continues until right before dusk.

I tell you, if it wasn’t for these wee critters, my lunchtime walks, in the summer, would be next to impossible.